Photo: Meghan Fowler and Kim Mills
When Bowmanville resident Kim Mills received a registered letter saying she had been “removed” from the membership of Calvary Baptist Church in Oshawa for being gay, her initial reaction was “hurt.”
“It really hurts to feel that I’m no longer accepted because I’m gay,” said the 37-year-old in an interview with Today’s Northumberland.
The registered letter was dated October 30, 2018, but she didn’t receive the letter until November 5 when she went to the Post Office.
“I regret to inform you that the Leadership of Calvary Baptist Church removed you from membership of Calvary Baptist Church effective October 25, 2018,” wrote Deacon Chairman Dr. Tim Wagner.
“It was brought to our attention that you have chosen to live in disobedience to the Scriptures, specifically disregarding the warning of 1 Corinthians 6:9, in spite of repeated efforts by other believers in your life, including other Calvary leadership and finally our pastoral staff, and as such, we advised the membership of your removal.”
Dr. Wagner continues by stating, “we are exercising our responsibilities to follow the biblical instructions toward the goal of your repentance and full restoration to your walk with Christ and his church fellowship.”
“It is a very serious matter to remove a member for discipline – our hearts are broken over it.”
“We will pray for your full restoration,” states Dr. Wagner.
Mills has been religious most of her life and when she settled in Bowmanville, a friend introduced her to the church in Oshawa.
“It was great. There was programs on, lots of stuff happening and I jumped right in.”
Along with attending services, she was an active member of the church community as a Youth Leader and volunteering in other ways.
At first Mills kept her relationship with her partner Meghan Fowler “in the closet,” which was hard on her and her partner.
But after attending various functions on Sunday evenings with bible study it came up in conversation.
“I had shared with some of the women and some people knew, but because I wasn’t willing to make changes to my lifestyle and changes to what I believe, this has been the result.”
“It took me awhile to even share that part of me with the church for fear of being judged.”
Rumblings in the church grew stronger opposing her lifestyle and leaders communicated to her, “this was sin and I was being disobedient.“
“I knew at that point, I was no longer able to be a youth leader because of my choices.”
Mills still kept going even though she was aware it was something the church didn’t support.
“I did feel people were judging me and that’s a hard thing to walk into when you’re going into somewhere and you’re judged for who you are.”
“This letter for me has definitely driven me more about what I believe God is. I don’t agree that anybody should be treated differently because they are gay.”
“Christianity should be about love and acceptance.”
“The God I know and the God I believe in wouldn’t want one of his children to feel differently.”
“First of all he designed me this way and he knows my heart.”
Since Mills and Fowler agreed to post the letter from the church online on Monday at approximately 5 p.m., “the outpouring of love and support has been amazing.”
“I had no idea it would go viral,” said Mills.
“That just shows there is something wrong.”
Through the many messages she’s received in the past 24-hours one was from a Reverend from the United Church..
“What she said to me was, “come as who you are and we’re going to love you for who you are and you don’t need to change.”
When gay marriage is legal in Canada, but is a sin in some churches, in 2018 Mills said, that is a problem.
“Being a Christian is about having a personal relationship with Jesus and God and nobody can tell me what my relationship is like with God and Jesus, but they’re trying to judge based on what they believe. I believe I’m accepted just the way I am – so why can’t they accept me the way I am.”
Author: Pete Fisher
Has been a photojournalist for over 30-years and have been honoured to win numerous awards for photography and writing over the years. Best selling author for the book Highway of Heroes - True Patriot Love
